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Memoiring Book Club's avatar

Priceless advice, Ruthie! We are a nation of such extremes. We so often cannot terminate unwanted pregnancies or achieve much wanted pregnancies without great personal cost in this country. I know it’s not the same issue, but it’s hard not to see these things as politically, historically relevant right now.

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Ruthie Ackerman's avatar

Thank you Melisse!! <3

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Memoiring Book Club's avatar

This invoice is 💯 (and 100 percent sucky!)

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Leslie Bradshaw's avatar

Ruthie: This is SO real. Thank you for putting words to what I have been sitting with since freezing my eggs in 2019 when I was single.

Now, here in 2025, I am sitting with whether or not I use them for a second child.

My partner and I have a 2 year old that I (we?) didn't use my frozen eggs to conceive, so does that mean I (we?) should / shouldn't use my eggs if we try for a second (?!!?) Maybe not the "million dollar question", but the high 6-figure question for darn sure.

To add to the math you have in case it's helpful for other readers:

> All in, I am at about $20k for the egg retrieval for 4 cycles (2 didn't work but cost meds; 2 worked and resulted in 11 eggs each). No insurance coverage. No partner at the time to share this cost. (documented the process in real time over on Medium here: https://medium.com/@lesliebradshaw/i-froze-22-eggs-at-36-heres-what-i-learned-3ae54d956273... I am a bit after your journey and a bit before the Liz Plank era of sharing and finding community, per your wonderful section in your book on the topic)

AND:

> Add to this my monthly storage costs (averaged out it's been ~ $80 / month, $960 / year... x 6 years so far = ~ $6.5k)

And lastly, another interesting insight...

> My doctors let me know that provided my body can hold life (uterus, etc.), they will implant an embryo up to age 56 (!) which means I have 13 years to decide.

> Delaying my decision also means more monthly payments, which I'd like to keep doing for the option but I am also thinking in the back of my mind: do I do this for the next 13 years, or will there be a line I draw sooner?

Big hugs. And hope Clementine and Maria can meet up one of these days <3

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Ruthie Ackerman's avatar

Thank you so much for sharing your experience, Leslie! It’s so real and can be so hard because there isn’t one clear answer – just weighing a bunch of pros and cons. I hope Clem and Maria can meet, too! <3

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