What I Couldn’t Have Known

Musings on Omega Institute and Allowing Yourself to Be a Beginner

The first time I went to Omega Institute was in October 2016, one year and one month after my divorce. The following month I’d meet Rob, but I didn’t know that yet. In a little over three years I’d be pregnant with Clementine, but I didn’t know that either. 

The day I caught the train up to Omega I walked into my local coffee shop, the one that doesn’t exist anymore except as a ghost in my mind, and a young woman probably half my age told me I was “rocking” my hiking backpack. I told her where I was going and that it was a solo writing retreat to write a memoir, which I’d have no way of knowing would become The Mother Code and that almost a decade later would be published by Random House. 

ruackerman

A post shared by @ruackerman

I headed to Omega Institute that day to write even though I had no idea what I was writing. But I also was going there to try to hear my truest voice, my deepest desires. I wanted the universe to tell me whether I was going to have a baby someday. 

That young girl who talked to me that day had no idea that she was a mirror, showing me what my life looked like to the outside world: a brave woman making space to follow her dream, to give herself permission to write even if nothing came out of it. 

But something did come out of it. And I’d argue, something always does.

Last week, I returned to Omega Institute this time to teach a writing class called Unlock Your Story to over a dozen strangers, some of whom had never written before. It felt like a full circle moment, not only because Omega meant so much to me in my writing process, but also because my daughter Clementine was with me. She’s only three so she doesn’t yet know what going to Omega together means to me. But our time together there this past week will always be part of our story.

ruackerman

A post shared by @ruackerman

What I walked away from Omega with this time was a few lessons from my students, which I want to share with you. My mind was blown by how incredible everyone’s writing was and a part of that was because my students weren’t burdened by the rules of writing. They didn’t overanalyze. They just wrote. It reminded me that as writers we need to allow ourselves to be beginners. There are no experts in writing. Every project is new, different. We need to come to the page free of shoulds and rigid rules. Allow ourselves to play in the sandbox. Explore. Meander. Be open to what arrives.

The only difference between an essay or book that gets written is that the author doesn’t give up. Keep going. Don’t stop. Your story needs to be told.

The necklace I had to buy when I was at Omega. @satyajewelry

You’re never too old and it’s never too late. @ducrotisabella

I can’t believe I only discovered these cardamom buns now. @fabriquebakery

Clementine and I did yoga poses for hours. @barefootbooks

Because I want my brows to look like Brooke Shields back in the day. @grandecosmetics

The system isn’t broken, it was built this way. @thebeeandthefox

So comfortable in the heat and looks hot too. @jungmaven

For all of you O’Keeffe lovers. @okeeffemuseum

• Apply for my 6-Month Book Incubator kicking off September 25th! More details here. Application here (deadline to apply for this is August 7th!!)

• Sign up for my Six Week Kickstarter that starts in September – a perfect place to dive back into a writing project or start a new one. You’ll generate work using my tried and true exercises and prompts and is the perfect antidote to writer’s block.

• 1:1 coaching